Hynas, Part 1: Individuality...or lack thereof.

Hello everyone, this part of our blog is brought to you by: Hynas. Now, in order to fully convey our disgust with this subculture of females ranging in ages 15 to 25, this will have to be a several part series.

Not even Costco has muffin tops this big.

A "Hyna" is defined by the Urban Dictionary as "a HOT Chicana in the Barrio, keeping it real." This definition could not be further from the truth. This part is about the individuality, or lack there of, among hynas who can be easily identified by their trademarks: Stenciled-on eyebrows, black lip liner with no lipstick on, the crunchy hair sustained by a can and a half of Aqua Net, the big hoop earrings, the black bra underneath the white tank top, and last but not least, the skinny jeans tucked into the Uggs in 95 degree heat.

The question I ask myself every time I see 15 year old Guadalupe walking down the street, pushing a baby in her stroller with another in the oven, is why do they think they are so unique if they dress and act exactly like every other hyna? I have a unique insight into this (having dated a hyna for a short period of time) and my theory is this; hynas are so unhappy with their mediocrity that they have to cling to anything they can to make themselves unique. Be it their style of dress, attitude, the car they drive, or the careers they choose, sadly these are all the same.

With their background now established, lets get to the hatin. I hate when these hynas walk around acting like they are so different from everyone else when they are exactly the same in every way. They all have the same stupid 'holier than thou' attitude, even though most of them work as a receptionist making less than $10 an hour. Yet you always see them texting on their brand new Droid or iPhone, while driving their leased Altimas with rent- to-own 20" rims. Along with the attitude comes the style of dress, which are the skinny jeans, Ugg boots, stupid bug eye sunglasses, and the crunchy hair. Of course they think they all look good (and i'll admit some do), but then you have the muffin toppin' ones who are like 300 pounds, but still squeeze themselves into a size 4 and walk around as if they are America's next top model.

And finally, career choices. I'm sorry, but I don't see what these hoes are so proud of working as medical assistants, receptionists, and sandwich artists at Subway. But apparently filing papers and making cold cut combos makes it okay to walk around like Ivanka Trump, saying things like "stuuuuuuuppppiiiiiidddd" or "ohhhh heeelllllll naawwwww."

This has been a hatin' session with Allen and Nolan. This is also the first time i have ever blogged, so forgive the crude nature of my post. If you have anything to add, please feel free to comment and add your thoughts.